It really is a wonderfully diverse, complex – almost psychotic world, isn’t it…I’m so glad you agree.
Someone invited me to comment on the weather today – how very British. At eight this morning, the skies turned to murk, the sun was blotted out and howling winds played music around the buildings. A sandstorm had reduced visibility to less than 25 metres and all the lights in the house flickered and went out. Garden furniture ended up in the pool and stout palms bowed like saplings in the wind.
God is clearly very cross with me and the storm is all my fault. I have to say, I found myself not quite sharing the Reverend Clyde H Higgins’ righteous anger on the +5 sandstorm in Beijing on March 20th. Don’t blame me for the grammar, I didn’t write it.
“God has made his frustration with China known by casting a great sandstorm plague upon their dread pirate nation. Today, billions of Chinese flee in terror as a great orange sandstorm whips (sic) their soy scented streets. New reports show this great wrath of God extends over 810,000 square miles and immediately struck down over 250 million Chinese. For centuries, China has disobeyed God. They have worshipped false idols and torture their people. China persecutes Christians. They reject democracy and hate America for its freedom. The Chinese are truly a wrong people and no wonder our good friend Amber Cooper says I am extremely terrified of Chinese people. The Bible warns that God will punish China for their sin of being Chinese”.
Regular readers are gonna LOVE this site. Did you know, gays are to blame for the volcano in Iceland?
My horoscope is a source of endless amusement and elicits childlike clapping of hands whenever I get to look forward to all the nice stuff that’s gonna happen to me. Listen to this…
“No matter what is going on in your life, most of you should be able to find something to be joyful about. Look to your siblings and neighbours for support; even if you think your life is terrible, they are likely to have it worse! Honestly, Capricorn, with so much going on in your fifth house of pleasure, your biggest problem is trying to decide what path of revelry you want to take.”
I shall die laughing. In my fifth house of pleasure, clearly.